Changed
by ofbooksandnature
Summary: Taking place right after she finds out Aspen is in the palace as a guard, what will happen if America decides she should tell Maxon? How will this one choice change her whole life in the selection? How will this affect things between her and Maxon? Read to find out :) (maxerica!)
1. Chapter 1

**Hello readers! Thanks for clicking on my story and giving it a try! This story starts right after America finds out Aspen is a guard in the palace, but instead of keeping it a secret from Maxon, she does something else, changing the whole plot for the Selection as we know it! I hope you enjoy it! Happy reading~**

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I looked in the oval mirror hanging above my dresser, suddenly feeling pangs of sadness and hurt all over now that Maxon left me to my room. I clutched my chest with one hand and leaned on the large and white wood dresser with the other, looking away from my red eyes. As time went on in the Selection, I could feel my heart and head slowly distancing itself from Aspen and getting closer to Maxon. It was hard enough to do that when Aspen wasn't here to remind me of the heartache of that day we parted so harshly.

I had just seen him downstairs with Maxon, and was unable to even enjoy a second of my time with him because of it. The whole movie was spent panicking about what I should do. I wondered if Maxon felt my nerves. Now that Aspen was here I somehow felt the tugging need to tell Maxon but also keep it a secret. Whatever happened between Aspen and I was in the past, it was illegal for me to be with him until Maxon released me. Besides, I didn't quite want to leave. I cared for Maxon more deeply than I wanted to admit. Knowing Aspen was here would kill him, he'd probably dismiss Aspen on the spot.

I could feel my breathing getting quicker and the air getting thinner as thoughts of heartbreak and confusion swamped my head. All I could think about was _how could he be here? How is that of all people, Aspen was chosen to come to the palace?_

"Miss are you alright?" Anne exclaimed, interrupting my train of thought.

"I- can't- br-breathe-" I choked, not able to tell the difference between my racking sobs and hyperventilated breathing. "Every-thing- is so- so dizzy- I can't-"

"America, you need to calm down and put your mind over matter." Anne said sternly, somehow conveying that this wasn't her first rodeo. "Put your arms above your head and slowly breathe with me. Do your absolute best to follow me, do _not_ allow panic to take over."

I shakily raised my arms, inhaling rattling breaths as she guided me. It took a while, but soon I was breathing slowly and calmly (or calmer) again. "Come on," she said, putting an arm around my back and hugging me tightly.

I held her tightly, not knowing how much I needed her embrace.

"Let's get you changed." she said warmly. "Lucy, take her night gown out and so I can draw a bath. Mary, run down to the kitchens and tell them to deliver America's meal to her tonight. She needs rest."

"Should I tell his majesty Prince Maxon?" Mary asked.

"Yes, and get some sleeping pills as well."

Mary nodded, walking quickly out the door. My body felt cold, shaking slightly as Anne walked me towards the bathroom. Lucy slowly took off my dress as Anne drew the bath, pouring in some soothing lavender oils to go with the bubbles. I slipped into the bath and closed my eyes, not knowing what to say. They seemed to understand, knowing when I was upset that I had to be alone for a while. Anne left the door cracked, so that she could hear me if I needed anything. After my bath, I got dressed in the silkiest and most soothing night gown I had here.

Once Mary set me up with a dinner tray in my bed, Lucy asked me gingerly, "Miss, I don't mean to pry, but may I ask what happened?"

"Lucy!" Anne scolded, not approving of her improper question.

"It's okay." I said weakly. "I'm sorry you had to see me like that. And thank you, for helping me. But I'm afraid I can't say...at least not yet. I need to figure some things out."

"But you're not going home yet are you?" Mary asked quickly, I could hear the fear in her voice too.

"No, not all. I'm sorry, I should have said, of course that's what you thought," I said.

They all sighed in relief, Lucy putting a hand to her chest lightly.

"Come, ladies, I think America would like her rest now." Anne said softly. "Just ring when you want your tray taken. Mary set the sleeping pill and a glass of water next to your bed. Rest."

"I will, thank you." I said. They all walked out of the room, quieter than their usual selves. I ate my meal quickly, ringing the bell so that I could take that damn sleeping pill and get some rest. I didn't know how else to handle all my feelings right now.

A moment later a knock sounded from my door around my room. _That was quick,_ I thought.

"Come in," I tried to say loudly, but my voice even cracked at that.

I looked towards the door, the shoes sounding on the floor were not similar to the ones my maids wore. I quickly stood up and unplugged the night stand lamp, gripping it high as a weapon. With the rebel attacks lately, I couldn't be sure that it wasn't someone to hurt me.

But it wasn't at all what I was expecting, Maxon rounded the corner, his eyes widening as he stopped in his step and saw me holding the lamp in my nightgown.

"America?" he asked, laughing lightly.

I set the lamp down, sighing in turn. "You scared me. You were supposed to be a maid to take down my tray." I quickly walked over to the closet and put a robe over my gown, feeling somewhat embarrassed to be caught in my skivvies with Maxon.

"Well, if you were going for scaring me, I'd say you did quite well. I've never seen someone so strongly grip a lamp in protection." he smiled, but I wasn't in the mood for any jokes.

"I'm sorry, I'm not really good company right now." I said quietly, taking a tired seat on the edge of my bed.

"Nonsense. You're always good company. But I'm sorry you're not feeling well, your maids told me you felt sick."

I nodded, this wasn't a lie. The situation with Aspen here, walking the halls as I competed to marry Maxon _did_ make me feel sick.

"You were looking rather pale before the movie, I'm sorry if I tired you and made it worse, my dear."

I didn't even have the energy to fight the pet name I couldn't stand. It was as if seeing Aspen all over again drained me of any life. Now I was just worrying that somehow Maxon knew. If he had been paying attention, (though most boys don't), he would have seen my discomfort with Aspen before the movie and maybe he would have put two and two together. "I think I just need to rest." I said after a moment of silence, trying to hint at the fact that I wanted to be left alone.

"Yes, of course. I'll leave you." he said, kissing my forehead gently. "Oh, I almost forgot to tell you. I had that officer, Leger I think, posted outside your door. Now I can rest too knowing you aren't by yourself."

I stood up quickly from my seat, my stomach dropping, making me feel even more genuinely sick than before. "You didn't have to do that-" I started, but he quickly said something, cutting me off.

"I think we'll both feel safer knowing someone you know is here to protect you."

Guilt enveloped me, making me feel even dizzier than before. Suddenly, I couldn't even respond, I couldn't open my mouth, afraid that somehow my stomach that was twisted in a thousand knots would throw up my meal. My eyes started to fail me, black spots slowly taking over my sight.

"America?" a concerned voice asked. "Are you alright?"

But before I could answer, the world dissolved from my senses, leaving me alone in darkness.

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 **Thank you so much for reading! I hoped you liked the first chapter :) comment below to leave any constructive criticism or let me know what to do to make the story better! follow to keep getting updates- I try and post a chapter a day if I can :)) thanks again for reading!**


	2. Chapter 2

**Wow! I'm so glad people are liking my story! Here is another chapter :) enjoy!**

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My eyes fluttered open slowly, but I shut them quickly, the white light surrounding me was too bright for me. I lifted a hand to my head and cringed, it felt like my brain was throbbing inside of my skull. I slowly began to open my eyes again, taking in my surroundings. _Where was I?_

I looked to my left and saw a doctor tending to someone next to me. _I was in the hospital wing?_ I looked to my right to see Maxon, asleep in the chair next to me. I looked down and realized his hand was on mine. He looked so calm and peaceful when he was asleep. The normally stoic and composed face and body of his finally had the chance to relax and let go. I'd never seen him with his walls down like this before. Was that what he thought when he saw me asleep?

I tried to sit up a little, careful to not move Maxon's hand in mine, I wanted to watch him sleep a little more. This felt like the first time in our relationship that I wasn't the vulnerable one. I knew that wasn't completely true, but it was nice to finally see him- _Damn!_

He shifted a little, opening his eyes, "Hey, you're awake." he smiled. His sleepy face was even cuter than his sleeping one. He sat up, rubbing his eyes with the hand that wasn't still held in mine.

"What happened?" I asked, not remembering much.

"I came to your room to check on you, you looked sick but I didn't really realize how bad it was..." he said, his face suddenly not so sleepy looking. "You looked pale, you were breathing really heavy and before I could do anything, you collapsed."

"I passed out?" I asked.

"The doctor ran some tests, you were really dehydrated, but nothing else was wrong."

I knew I wasn't sick, I remembered the real reason why I fainted, and I felt sick all over again.

"America?" he asked, his face getting worried. "America what's wrong?"

"Nothing." I said quickly, looking away. "Nothing, I'm fine, I just need some sleep in my own bed I think."

"Whatever you need. I do think I should let you know, it's 6 am now. But please rest, until you're better." he looked genuinely nervous for me.

"I think I'll skip breakfast, if that's okay?" I said.

He nodded, "Of course. I can take you back to your room."

"No," I said a little too quickly, regretting my words almost immediately. "I'm sorry, I think I just need to be alone."

"I'm sorry, but after what happened last night, I don't think that's the best idea, leaving you alone." he said adamantly. "I'm sending a guard with you."

"Fine." I said. As long as I didn't have to face him I would be okay. "Would you hand me my robe?" I asked, it was laying on the chair next to him.

"Here," he said giving me a hand up. He took the robe, holding it up so he could put it one me.

"Thanks." I said softly, not knowing what else to do.

A guard came up to me, and my heart sank. It was Aspen. I swallowed my pride and fear and stood a little straighter.

"I thought you might like a familiar face." Maxon said.

"Thank you," I said weakly.

"If by lunch, you still need rest, just call for me. I'll eat with you." he said quietly, he was obviously still rattled by my collapsing.

"Okay." I said, afraid if I said much more, my voice would crack and Aspen would see my fear.

Maxon kissed my forehead tenderly and said, "See you then."

I nodded and turned away, walking to my room with Aspen following closely behind.

"Mer." he said as we walked. I ignored him, my body growing angrier and angrier as we walked. "Mer!"

"Stop it!" I whisper-hissed. "You don't get to speak to me. You don't get to even look at me."

"Mer, just talk to me." he said, "How can you just ignore me?"

"Like this." I said, walking in silence.

He took my arm, stopping me in my tracks. "America!"

"No!" I ripped my arm away. "You could be punished _severely_ for laying a hand on me. You could be sent to New Asia to die if anyone knows you're trying to pursue me. Don't make this worse than it already is, just leave me alone."

"You would do that?" he asked, stopping his movement. "You would actually have him send me there? You know I thought it was an act on the TV. You couldn't really be that way. But you really have changed."

"I would never if I could help it, Aspen! You know I wouldn't! Don't make me have to tell him by doing something we'll both regret!" I exclaimed.

"I don't regret anything I've ever done with you." he said, obviously trying to woo me.

"Really? Not a single thing?" at this point, anger was boiling over in me.

"Well, obviously, that, but not ever being with you." he said.

"Well I do." I said bitterly. "Take yourself out of the rounds to watch my door. Don't offer to escort me anywhere, tell your superiors that you don't want to be near me. Just leave me alone. If you don't, I'll tell Maxon."

"You wouldn't." he spat. "We're meant for each other, Mer. You just can't see it because you're blinded by everything here. The dresses, and jewelry, and luxury. Even the people."

"Don't speak against _anyone_ here. You have no idea-"

"Have you forgotten where you come from already? Are you that stuck up that you already forgot your family of fives-"

I cut him off, slapping him across the face. I straightened my robe out and stood up tall. "Leave me alone, Aspen."

I turned around, walking to my room quickly. I shut the door, sighing and leaning my back against it when I was done. This was all just too much for me to handle anymore. I scrambled in bed and closed my eyes, falling into a deep sleep.

I groaned as I woke up, yawning as well. My maids were happily sewing and quietly tidying around me as I sat up. "What time is it?" I grumbled.

"3:18." Lucy giggled.

"What?" I asked, my eyes shooting open. "In the afternoon?"

"Yes. Prince Maxon told us to let you sleep as long as you needed."

Maxon. Aspen. I felt sick again, guilt overcoming me. I knew if I didn't talk to someone about it all soon, I'd lose my mind. I stood up and I quickly grabbed a piece of paper to scribble a note to Maxon,

 ** _Maxon,_**

 ** _I can't explain right now, but I really need to talk to my dad right now. Writing a letter would take too long and I really need his advice about something. Could I use a telephone? I'm sorry I wish I could tell you why but I can't yet. I'll explain everything when it's all done and over with, I promise._**

 ** _America_**

I gave the note to Anne to deliver to Maxon and sat down on a chair on my balcony. I looked out at the gardens and sighed. This was more stress than I ever bargained for when I signed up for the selection. I didn't know what to do. It felt like I couldn't tell anyone without getting in huge trouble. I didn't even trust my maids yet with the secret.

"Miss, Maxon sent me with this." Anne smiled. "I've never actually held one before." she walked with a little skip in her step as she carried the telephone to a table to plug in. She connected it to the landline and handed me a note. "He sent this as well."

I took the note quickly, opening it up and reading it.

 _ **My dear America,**_

 ** _I'm sorry that you're going through some trouble right now. Please feel free to keep the telephone in your room for whenever you need. I admit that one of my weaknesses is denying you anything. (Please feel free to take advantage of that.) I only ask of two things, only call around once or twice a week and don't tell any of the other girls. I hope you're feeling better. Also, tugging my ear in the gardens... whenever._**

 ** _With love, Maxon_**

I smiled, holding the note a little closer to my chest. "Anne, Mary, Lucy, I need a moment alone to use the telephone, do you mind?"

"I'm almost done with the dress-" Lucy said, moving her needle quickly.

"Lucy!" Mary scolded.

"It's just a few more stitches-"

"It's alright Lucy, you can stay. I don't mind." I said nervously.

Lucy smiled and gave a 'ha' smirk to Mary and Anne. She continued to sew, "You won't even know I'm here."

My other maids curtsied and left the room.

"Lucy, I have to be honest, you're about to hear something that you are absolutely not allowed to tell anyone do you promise? Before you react to what I tell my dad, you have to wait for my explanation, okay?" I asked nervously, picking up the phone.

She nodded, her smile fading from her lips as she wove her needle in and out of the lavender fabric. I dialed my dad's phone number, holding the note from Maxon tightly in my hand.

"Hello?" he asked, his voice was confused sounding, our family didn't get calls very often.

"Hey daddy." I smiled.

"America! Hey, kiddo, what's going on?" he asked.

"Not much. Well, actually a lot. I needed to talk to you. I have a problem." I said, biting my lip to hold a tear back.

"What is it?" he asked, getting more serious.

"I- I never told you this- but back home- I" I had such a hard time saying this, I didn't want him to judge me. "Dad, Aspen Leger and I, we-"

"I know, kitten." he said with a small sigh.

"You do?" I squeaked.

"Yes, I know."

"But, how-"

"You think I didn't notice you sneaking out of your window and crawling up the treehouse every week after curfew?" he laughed lightly.

"You saw us?"

"The first time I noticed it was when I was in the workshop working on a painting, and I saw someone tiptoeing across the backyard. I got scared at first, I thought someone was breaking in, but then I saw your hair. Every now and then after that I'd see you do the same thing. It was only a matter of time before you started taking the long route home to walk through his neighborhood, stuff like that."

"Oh." I said.

"Besides, even if I didn't notice you doing that you were different. Happier. You hummed and danced around the house more. It was nice."

I sniffled at the thought of me in the past, happy and carefree. "Well, even if you knew we were together, you have to know we never did anything...illegal. Besides breaking curfew." I clarified.

"I assumed as much." he said gruffly.

"Well," my voice cracked as I spoke, "We were going to get married dad. We had both been saving for so long, and then...he broke up with me. He ended things because he knew he couldn't provide for me the way he wanted, but I didn't care. I didn't care at all." Tears were coming steadily now. "And then I was picked for the Selection and it was easier to be away from him. And then I met Maxon. Dad I've never experienced anything like being with him."

"I can tell."

"How?" I giggled through my runny nose. "I haven't even seen you since I left."

"The report. I think everyone can tell honey." he said with a hearty chuckle.

"Well, dad, that's the problem. Aspen, he- he's here. He was enlisted and sent to the palace. He wants me back, but dad, I'm here for Maxon and I don't know what to do." I broke down.

"Do you love them both?" he asked, a little afraid of his own question.

"Yeah. But in completely different ways." I sniffled.

"Look kiddo, here's what it comes down to. Take away the selection. Take away the legal obligation to only be there for Maxon. Take away what your caste would be and the kind of life you'd be living. Take away everything except how you feel about each of them, and decide. You can't hold on to them both, it's not fair for anyone in that situation."

"I know." I said, my voice foggy from crying.

"Do you know what you're going to do?" he asked.

I nodded to myself, knowing he couldn't see it anyways. "Yeah, I think I know."

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 **Ooooh, cliff hangers! I'm sure you can guess what America's going to do, but you'll have to wait and see for sure with the next update. Comment to let me know what you think of the story! Thank you for reading! Love y'all and will update soon :)**


	3. Chapter 3

**Wow! The positive feedback on my story has been so nice! Thank you to everyone who's reading this right now! You rock :)**

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As soon as I finished my talk with my dad, I bolted around the room to get ready. Naturally, my mind was trying to work around having to tell Maxon the truth rather than confronting it face on. I clenched my jaw and huffed, hopping around as I put on shoes to match my simple blue dress.

Maxon was waiting out in the garden for me. I bounded down the stairs, my anxious nerves causing me to move fast.

I was just at the garden doors when I heard a small voice behind me. "America?"

I turned around to see Kriss standing in a beautiful light purple colored day dress. She wore a sparkly headband that could have passed for a tiara if you thought about it enough. "Yeah?" I asked, a little winded and antsy to get to Maxon. I couldn't take it anymore, the longer I waited the more guilty I felt.

"I'm glad to see you're looking better," she said, a little sour note in her tone as she obviously didn't believe my illness from last night.

"Thanks," I said, "I was just-"

"Looking for Maxon?" She gave a sugary smile at the end. "So was I. We have a date for lunch."

"In the garden?" I asked, feeling pain in my chest. That was our place.

"Yep." she giggled.

"I thought-"

"Ladies." I heard his charming voice say behind me. I turned back around to see Maxon, a bright smile on his face.

"Your Highness," Kriss smiled softly, curtsying. "I'm afraid you double-booked your lunch."

"Not at all, we'll have lunch in a moment Kriss, I just needed to talk with America beforehand really quickly." he said kindly. _Ouch_. We were supposed to have lunch.

"Look, Maxon," I took a step towards him. "I really need to talk to you. About what I was telling my dad."

"I know, that's what we'll do." he smiled, "Kriss, there's a table outside for us, would you mind?"

"Of course," she smiled at him, giving me a look once she was behind his back that just rubbed it all in. Anger fumed in me, I was telling him something important, something that really mattered to me.

"What is it, my dear?" he asked, his hands taking one of mine into his own.

I pulled it back and took a step away. "I'll just tell you later."

"You can tell me," he said, his face looking scrunched. "Why'd you need to call your dad?"

"Look, this really isn't something I can just tell you in your five minute time slot before your lunch date with Kriss." I said with spite. "This is really important and it's obvious that you have other priorities right now." I turned around, only to feel his hand on mine.

"America-" he said, sounding hurt, but I was more hurt than he was.

"No." I said strongly. "Just forget it."

I walked back up the stairs to my room, feeling stupid for thinking I could tell him about Aspen. That the reason I couldn't fully commit to Maxon was because I might still be in love with him.

I changed out of my dress, suddenly feeling horribly out of place in this castle.

I threw on the light wash pair of skinny jeans Maxon gave me and the one light grey t-shirt I brought from home. On my neck was the songbird necklace. I pulled my hair into a loose ponytail, eager to get it off of my flushed face. I walked to my window, the marble floors feeling cool against my bare foot. I peeked out of them, seeing the table set for Kriss and Maxon's lunch being taken away. The two were no where to be found.

I suddenly heard a knock on my door. I walked slowly across the room and leaned my back against it. "Who is it?" I asked, closing my eyes.

"It's me." Maxon said. "Please let me in."

I bit my lip, trying to hold back tears. I twisted the handle slightly, so that the door unlatched and began to walk towards my bed. I heard his dress shoes follow me from behind.

"America," he said simply. It was strange; it was as if in this single and solitary word he managed to plead my to speak to him and say sorry all at once. I crossed my arms, looking down at the ground.

"Don't you have a date with Kriss right now?" I asked angrily.

"I'm sorry, America." he said cautiously, watching his words very closely. "I asked her to lunch a few days ago. I completely forgot I'd asked her. All I could think about was you once you collapsed. I even missed a budget meeting this morning."

I sniffled a little, seeing how he could have made the mistake, but not wanting to admit that.

"Where is she now?" I asked, trying to change the topic away from my anger.

"She's taking lunch with everyone else. I explained to her what happened to you and she completely understood why I needed to talk to you to see if you were okay." he said slowly.

"Well I'm not." I said, my voice cracking a little.

"Darling, what's wrong?" he asked, his steps coming a little closer to me. I was still turned around, looking out the window instead of at him.

"I have to tell you something." I whispered after a moment of silence.

"Is this about the phone call?" he asked, his voice sounding more serious and nervous all at once.

I nodded and turned to face him. His face, which normally concealed all emotion to put on a brave face, was now solemn looking maybe even a little scared. "Yes. It's about the phone call. And why I collapsed last night."

"America, you can tell me, you can trust me." he said, putting his hands gently on my arms.

"I'm afraid if I do, you'll hate me." I said, tears slowly coming freely now.

"I could never hate you, America Singer. No matter what you did or how hard you tried, I don't think I could ever even come close to hating you." he said, I could tell the truth in his voice and eyes, only making me feel more guilty.

"Maybe that's worse." I whispered.

"Just tell me." he said, obviously antsy himself about all of this.

"I had to call my dad for advice. On what to do." I said vaguely, not wanting to delve out more information than that.

"About?" Maxon asked, obviously needing more.

"You remember when I told you about the guy I was in love with before I came here?" I said quietly, not looking him in the eye.

"You want to return to him..." Maxon said, his face falling quicker than the blink of an eye.

"No! Well- It's just.." I sighed, sitting down on the edge of my bed. "I saw him yesterday."

"What?" He asked, confused. "How? Did he break in-"

"No. Of course not. He was...he was the guard outside the movie theater that recognized me." I whispered, looking down at my hands as they trembled.

"The guard?" his face falling again.

I nodded. "Yes. I saw him, and I didn't realize I could feel that much pain... Maxon, I-"

"Did you go to him last night?" he asked, anger rising in his voice.

"No, Maxon-"

"Did he come to you?" he yelled.

"No! Maxon listen to me!" I shouted, needing him to calm down.

"I'm sorry," he said, looking ashamed. "I shouldn't have yelled at you. It wasn't proper."

"I don't care about what's proper right now. I have to tell you this though. Last night when he escorted me back to my room, he did try to convince me we belonged together. He wants me back." I said weakly.

"And do you want to be with him?" he asked, pacing around the room.

"I don't know-"

"America, you have to know!" he said angrily, his face getting red. "Which is it? Me or him?"

I shook my head, "It's not that simple. You have to understand. I was with him for years, he was my first love. I don't know if I'll never not love him, even if it's just a little. Sometimes I don't know if that little bit of love is bigger than that. But then when I'm with you, everything changes." I cried. "When I'm with you I can imagine an eternity with you. I get so jealous having to share you with all the other girls."

"I can't keep you here America if you can't choose. I refuse to keep falling in love with you when your heart is with another." he said quickly.

"What?" I whispered, my heart stopping.

He too realized what he said, suddenly silent.

"You love me?" I asked, tears welling in my eyes.

He looked at me, standing up a little as he said, "How could I not be? It's been you from the start."

I stood up, quickly walking into his open arms. I breathed in his natural musk and felt all my muscles relax in his arms. He loved me. And I loved him. I knew that now. Being in this competition, it was like I needed validation for his feelings. I never quite knew where I stood among all the other girls. But something in me told me he wouldn't just say I love you to anybody.

"You." I whispered into his strong chest. "I love you."

I heard him sigh, his own body relaxing as it embraced me. "You have no idea how relieving it is to hear you say that, America."

I laughed softly, snuggling into him a little deeper. His arms squeezed me tighter, his lips brushing a soft kiss in my hair.

After a minute, he pulled away, "What about him?" he asked.

"What do you mean?" I asked.

"If you think I'm going to let this man of yours stay here in the castle, tempted by you and tempting you, you have another thing coming." he said.

I nodded. It was probably for the better. I didn't need him here to remind me of what could have been. I wasn't with him anymore. I didn't need to dwell on him. Not when I had Maxon.

"I agree." I said, "Just promise you will let him stay a guard. And don't send him to New Asia, please."

He looked a little hurt that I was defending Aspen. "Why?"

"He's the main provider for his family back home. They have nothing, Maxon. It wouldn't be right to send him to die, I couldn't bear it." I said strongly.

He nodded back to me. "Alright. But he can't stay here. I'll give him a position somewhere else."

"Promise you'll run it by me." I said. Even though I needed to move on, I still cared about him. I always would.

"I promise." he said.

I sighed in relief, a small smile rising on my lips.

"What?" he asked, a smile lifting on the corner of his lips as well.

"Oh, nothing. I was just thinking about what you told me a few minutes ago." I giggled.

"I'm sure I don't know what you're talking about..." he said with a smile, taking a step towards me.

"Maxon." I scolded with a laugh, "You know what I'm talking about."

"I don't think I do!" he said, enveloping me into his arms and placing a ticklish kiss on my neck.

"Maxon!" I laughed. He leaned in for a kiss, but I pulled my head back.

"Aww come on." he smiled, his big brown eyes gleaming at me.

"If you want a kiss, I require payment." I said.

"I love you." he said, staring deeply into my eyes and planting a peck on my lips. "I love you." Kiss. "I love you." Kiss. "I love you."

He kissed me slowly, holding my back gently with his strong arms.

"And I love you." I laughed.

It was as if a weight had been lifted from my shoulders. One that had been much heavier than I ever thought it was. I could finally breathe freely and think clearly. I didn't have any guilt blocking my conscience or any regret clouding my mind. Right now, I was just a girl in love with a boy. And that was all I needed.

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 **Hey guys! I hoped you liked reading the chapter as much as I enjoyed writing it! Fluff on fluff on fluff! More like this to come :))) let me know what you thought of the chapter and thanks for reading!**


	4. Chapter 4

**Thank you everyone for all the love! I'm so glad you're enjoying my story. Without further ado, the next chapter!  
**

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"What are you keeping from me?" Marlee asked, her usually bright and happy face seeming a little bothered by my secretiveness.

"Meet me in the library after breakfast, I'll tell you then." I whispered to her, spooning a scoop of berries on to my plate. "I can't say it here."

She nodded, looking a little happier that I was going to let her in on my deep dark secret.

"So." I said, spreading butter on my toast. "What's going on with you? Any progress with Maxon?" I realized that this was the first time I had asked her this not hoping she had grown closer with him, this was the first time I was asking to see where I stood. I wanted to be in first place.

"It's alright." she sighed lightly, taking a bite of a blueberry muffin.

"Just alright?" I pondered, setting my knife down.

"I'll tell you in the library," she muttered, taking another rather large bite.

"Is everything okay?" I asked, getting concerned for Marlee. It wasn't like her not to be bubbly at breakfast.

"She's just mad because Maxon asked me on a date and not her." Celeste bragged.

"That's _not_ true," Marlee said, her voice raising a little. "You have no idea what I'm going through right now, Celeste, so just back off."

Celeste sat in her seat looking a little shocked and stunned at Marlee. She wasn't expecting Marlee to fight back like that, I don't think. I smiled a little to myself and shook my head, popping a raspberry into my mouth. It was nice to see her put in her place for once.

"Ladies. If I could have your attention." Maxon said from the end of the table. He stood up, he looked so calm and collected, I would never have guessed he was about to eliminate almost everyone. "As the rebel attacks have been getting worse, and I truly believe I've spent enough time with you all to judge who I want in my life, I'm going to be eliminating everyone except for the 6 elite. I don't see any reason to keep you here in danger if I know we don't have a future. Your maids have already been notified and are packing your things, you are scheduled to leave after breakfast. Here are the following that have made it to the elite. Natalie, Elise, Celeste, Kriss, Marlee," he turned his eyes to mine and smiled, "and America. It was lovely getting to know the rest of you, and I wish you the best of luck in your future endeavors." he nodded and left the dining room quietly.

A sea of girls bursted into tears and cries. Marlee sighed next to me and Celeste flipped her hair over her shoulder as she stood up and left. She was obviously pleased with herself. I looked over at Tiny, who had fainted, Elise sat next to her and tried to shake her awake. It was mayhem. I now noticed that the queen and king had promptly left the dining hall a few minutes before Maxon made his announcement.

"Let's go." I tugged Marlee's arm. We both set our napkins on the table and jogged in our heels out of the dining hall.

We rounded the corner to the library and sat down next to the roaring fire. I told her everything as quietly as I could, watching the door to make sure no one came in and listened to our conversation. I told her about Aspen and I at home, how he showed up here and wanted me back, how Maxon understood when I told him. The only thing I left out was that we told each other we loved each other. I didn't want anyone else knowing about that quite yet. She looked a little shocked by the end, but didn't seemed more sad than anything.

"Marlee?" I asked, needing her to say something.

"America, I think I've ruined everything!" she said, breaking out into tears.

"Marlee what happened?" I asked, taking her hand into mine.

"I've messed it all up! I'll bring such disgrace to my family-" she choked. "America I think I'm in love with him."

"With Maxon?" my heart dropped. I didn't want to compete with Marlee. Not when we were such good friends now.

"No. Not Maxon." she whispered. "With Carter Woodwork."

"Who is that?" I asked, shocked but slightly happy that it wasn't Maxon.

"A guard, here at the palace." she said, tears flowing down her cheeks. "He's been posted outside my door. He's so kind. And nice. We haven't done anything yet-"

"Yet?" I asked. "You want to?"

She bit her lip and looked away, "Yes. I do. And so does he."

"Marlee, you could lose everything-"

"You almost lost everything." she snapped back. I sat up a little and clenched my jaw. She was right, but I didn't want to admit that.

"Then why don't you quit the selection?" I asked.

"Because." She muttered. "If I do, I would want to be with him. And how could I explain why or how I knew him? I couldn't. The story would tell itself." She put her face in her hands and cried. "I love him. I don't know what to do?"

"You can't stay here and talk to him, Marlee, you could be executed. You have to choose. It wouldn't be fair to either of you." I said.

"I know." she said, sniffling loudly through her tears. "I just had to tell you. I had to tell someone."

"I think you should tell Maxon." I said carefully.

"Are you crazy-" she whipped up.

"No, listen. Maxon cares about you. I know he does. He's so kind, I don't think he'd be mad at you."

"Of course he would America, I've been breaking the law!" she said angrily.

"I think if you tell him the truth now, you'll save him having to eliminate you later, and you won't be caught. If you're caught it will be so much worse Marlee."

She crossed her arms, seeing a little sense in my words. "But what about Carter. I have to be with him."

"I think if you tell Maxon how you feel, he would be open to letting you be with him."

"But how would I explain to the tabloids how I know Carter? This whole situation is impossible."

"There's always a line of suitors for the selected women, Marlee. Keep your relationship on the down low at first and then come out. You'd have to be careful, but you can't keep this a secret for much longer. How long have you been talking?"

"Since the third week." she said in an ashamed tone.

"You're lucky you haven't been caught yet." I said, almost angry at her for being so careless.

"You're right. I'll tell him." she sniffled.

I sighed, "Thank you."

"Would you be there with me when I do?" she asked.

"What?" I choked a little.

"I need you. He'll be more understanding if you're there. Everyone knows he loves you." she said with a small smile.

"I mean, I guess I can come." I said, nodding. "Of course I'll be there for you."

"Thank you," she sighed, embracing me in a large and tight hug. "I don't know what I'd do without you. I love you America."

"I love you too, Mar. Promise me you won't endanger yourself again until you talk to him."

"Promise." she giggled.

* * *

It was the night of the report, and I'd never been so nervous. Mostly now because this was the first report since I'd told Maxon I loved him. Since we both said it. My heart fluttered; I knew now that I had to win over the public. Their opinion of me mattered almost as much as Maxon's did.

"Hey, redhead." I heard someone say behind me. I could tell before seeing her that it was the falsely sweet Celeste Newsome.

"What?" I asked, turning around.

"I know your friend's little secret." She smiled, putting on a fresh layer of red lipstick on in front of the mirror.

"What are you talking about?" I bluffed, but I knew exactly what she was talking about.

"Marlee. Carter." she said with a little pout, drawing a heart in the air with her fingers. "Such a shame if the nation found out." she gasped, following with a cynical smile. She stood up, strutting away in her black dress.

"Marlee!" I said, walking toward her in her bright yellow dress.

"America, we're on in twenty seconds, get to your seat." Sylvia scolded me, pushing me into my chair on the end, far away from Marlee.

 _Damn it!_ I thought. Celeste was going to out Marlee to the whole world.

"In five, four, three, two," the director pointed his finger, the curtain pulling to the sides and the spotlights turning on to us.

"Hello!" Gavril smiled, his bright white teeth shining on the large tv screen showing what was being filmed. "Hello and good evening Illéa! Tonight, our gracious King will give us updates on the war in New Asia, the current tax plan, and a new plan for infrastructure repairs in Carolina. Then the rest of the time will be spent by an announcement or two from Prince Maxon!" he said with a smile. The camera zoomed in on us, showing that only six remained.

I smiled at the camera, trying to look as regal and beautiful as I could. Though I was a nervous wreck on the inside, I couldn't risk lowering myself in the ranks of the favorites. Especially now that there weren't many girls.

I zoned out, trying to remain composed as the King spoke about New Asia. Suddenly, it was time for Maxon to speak. "Hello, Gavril." he smiled, walking up to the podium.

"Hello Illéa." he said charmingly. "I'm pleased to announce that I have eliminated all but the elite, in my selection. The lovely ladies America, Celeste, Kriss, Elise, and Natalie remain." He didn't say Marlee's name. But she was sitting right here. I couldn't help but show my nerves anymore.

The crowd seemed to register this, a sea of murmurs arising. "Unfortunately, Lady Marlee will no longer be with us as a member of the selected. She and I have been good friends from the start of the competition, we've shared many memories and laughs. But I've been made aware that she does not have romantic feelings for me. And nor do I for her. It's my pleasure to part with her as friends from the selection." he turned to her and she stood up, walking towards him. "I wanted you all to know that the selected girls remaining are now only the five you see on stage. Marlee," he faced her, "I'm so glad to have met you. I hope you visit often."

Celeste was seething in her chair, upset that she didn't have the chance to cause a scandal. I, however, was so relieved that my smile was becoming visible.

Marlee smiled and said, "Thank you for having me, and for so graciously letting me leave. And thank you, Illéa for supporting me in this adventure!" The audience clapped as she curtsied and Maxon bowed his head slightly. Even in her leaving, the people absolutely loved her. She waved at the crowd and walked off the stage to the wings to go home I assumed. I wondered if I'd see her before she left. We had told Maxon last night about it all. He was upset, but agreed that their relationship was hardly romantic. He wished Marlee the best last night, but I never knew they planned this beautiful goodbye on the report.

The rest of the report flew by, our quick interviews over the beginning of training to be princess were somewhat annoying to me when all I could think about was saying goodbye to Marlee and kissing Maxon. I loved him for how good he was about everything with Marlee.

I raced to my room, hoping Marlee was there, only to find a note on my dresser.

 ** _America,_**

 ** _I'm sorry I didn't get to say goodbye, but I thought it was better if I left sooner rather than later. I'm sure you know by now that Celeste knows about me and Carter. She threatened my this morning. I'm sorry I didn't have time to tell you about saying goodbye on the report. I told Maxon about Celeste and he agreed that we needed to keep this all very insulated. We couldn't risk my cover being blown. Whatever she says now will be overshadowed by Maxon's word. I wish I could have said goodby, but I'm sure this won't be last time we see each other. I've left my address at the bottom of the page. Write to me! I can't thank you enough for helping me get out of that situation safely. I don't know what I'd do without you. Just know I'll be here rooting you for the win! I know you never said, but I know you love him. You belong together. Go get your man!_**

 ** _Lots of love,_**

 ** _Marlee_**

I held the letter close to my heart, a small tear slipping down my face. I was going to miss her so much. A small slip of paper fell onto the ground out of my hand. It must have been with the letter. It was a small note, scribbled by Maxon.

 ** _My darling,_**

 ** _I know tonight must have been a shock. I'm sorry. I didn't have a chance to tell you before it happened. Unfortunately I have a last minute meeting tonight I can't miss. Tugging my ear for breakfast in the garden at 8 so we can talk._**

 ** _All my love,_**

 ** _Maxon_**

 ** _P.S. Don't be mad at me for Marlee leaving without saying goodbye...it was her choice I promise! Did I mention that I love you..? See you tomorrow, darling._**

I tucked both of the notes into the small envelope I had in my piano bench with all the saved notes and letters I received while here at the selection. I took a bath and got into bed, everything seemed to be perfect right now. That was, until I heard the rebel sirens.

* * *

 **Hey everyone! I hope you enjoyed the chapter! Naturally, since I changed the plot of events, I think everything else about the series would change as well! I hope you like the way I'm doing it :) let me know what you think! Thanks again for reading!**


	5. Chapter 5

DISCLAIMER:

Hello all my readers! I realize that there's been some confusion with chapter five, so I took it down! I put up the wrong chapter on accident! I've been working on a few stories right now and got them mixed up! The real 5th chapter of the story should be published soon and will all make sense this time! Sorry everyone for all the trouble!

Thanks for reading!

-J


	6. Chapter 6

**Again, so sorry for all the trouble and mixed up chapters, I hope you enjoy this one...the real one lol...**

* * *

I panicked as I threw a robe on and took a running start out of my room towards the grand staircase to the big safe room with everyone else. The sound of the sirens blared around the palace halls, making it hard to hear if there was a rebel around the corner waiting to attack. I looked down the hall, a group of five or six men in beat up clothing spotted me and began to full-on sprint towards me.

I suddenly felt a sharp blow on the back of my head, and then the world faded out.

* * *

I woke up in a dimly lit and rather cold room. The walls were made of metal, as well as the floor. My bare skin on the ground sent goosebumps along my spine. Where was I? I sat up a little, breathing in sharply through my teeth as pain flooded the back of my head. What happened to me?

I looked up, only to see Aspen sitting on a small trundle bed, watching me. I scrambled backwards, quickly standing up and pulling my robe tighter around me to conceal my open skin.

"Come, on Mer, I've seen you before. There's no need to be ashamed." he said, his hands clasped as he rested his elbows on his knees in a hunched over fashion.

"I'm not ashamed, it's just-" I paused, not wanting to finish my sentence.

"It's just what?" he asked, his face blank.

"It's just that there's only one person I would want seeing me so...exposed...and it isn't you." I looked down.

His hands clenched tighter, a quick but deep breath exhaling from his nostrils. "You don't mean that."

"I do." I said as firmly as I could. "I meant what I said that night, I'm here for Maxon. You hurt me. We're over, Aspen."

"You can't actually think I believe you."

"Well you should. I already told Maxon about you." I said. His face fell.

"How come he hasn't shipped me off to New Asia then? If he really knew?" he said smugly.

"He's promised to keep you out of the war if you didn't contact me." I said.

Aspen scoffed, sitting up and crossing his arms.

"Speaking of, how is it that of all guards in the palace, you were the one to find me during a rebel attack? I assume this is one of the random safe rooms." I said, more frustrated than ever with him. I had risked a lot telling Maxon, and then protecting him. He didn't have the decency to believe me or respect me.

"It is. I was on duty on your floor." he said.

"I thought you were done being on my floor. That was part of the deal we had. You stay away from me." I said strongly.

"I made no promises." he said, his teeth gritted together.

I ignored his statement, I'd have to talk to Maxon about that later. "So how'd you find me? Knocked out? Not enough time to get to my designated safe room along with everyone else?"

"I hit you." he said smoothly.

My skin went cold and my heart dropped, "What?"

"I hit you." he said, looking me dead in the eye. "I knew you wouldn't agree to come with me alone. And we needed to talk."

"I can't believe you hurt me-" I said, tears welling in my eyes.

"IT WAS THE ONLY WAY." he bellowed, causing me to cringe against the wall. I was beginning to get genuinely scared with him here, and no one else.

I hoped the safe room walls were sound-proof, because the rebels would have no problem finding us if they weren't.

"This isn't going the way I needed it to..." he muttered, running his hands through his jet-black hair.

"Aspen, you're scaring me, stop..." I whispered, afraid to set him off if I spoke to loudly or didn't speak at all.

"I don't want to scare you, Mer," he stood up quickly, taking my face into his hands and breathing raggedly on me. "It's just, we belong together, we do-"

"Aspen, please, let go of me-" I wriggled in his arms and took a step back. My heart pounded faster in my chest than it ever has before. I had never felt this kind of fear before- it was so extreme that it almost wasn't fear anymore, it was closer to feeling violated. I felt sick in my own body, a bout of cold sweats starting on my forehead from the pressure of this situation. "Aspen, this isn't like you."

"No-" he said loudly, pointing his finger at me, " _this_ isn't like _you_. You were supposed to be mine forever, remember?"

"Then you broke up with me. You. broke my heart. And to top it all off, you ran off with that girl in the crowd when I left. Whatever we had is gone."

"You're talking nonsense!" he yelled, his mouth inches away from my face.

I froze, finally realizing what was happening. As he spoke, the reeking stench of alcohol rolled off his breath, ever so slightly making itself apparent to me. And that's when I got more scared. He wasn't in complete control of himself and he was emotional. I stood, stiff in my spot, not knowing what to do.

My train of thought was interrupted by a blast of wind into the little room. I turned around to see the safe-room door open. Thank god. I took a step out of the room, hoping to see Maxon, but no one was there. Then who opened the door?

It only took seconds for me to realize, the doors opened automatically after 48 hours of closing. They had to be open by hand otherwise. _I had been in there for 2 days? I had just spoken to him for 15 minutes at most. Was I knocked out the rest of the time?_

"Aspen." I turned around, scared tears overflowing on my cheeks. "How long have we been in there?"

"A while." he said angrily. "I hoped you would have woken up sooner. We didn't finish our conversation-"

"Lady America!" a loud and happy shout interrupted from across the hall. Anne and a guard saw me, rushing over to me and Aspen. Relief washed over my body, I wasn't alone with him now.

"Anne!" I threw my arms around her and let the tears flow freely.

"My lady, you're okay! Thank goodness you're okay." she exclaimed, feeling a similar relief I realized.

"Officer Leger, it's good to see you. Were you and the lady trapped in there this whole time?" the guard asked Aspen.

Aspen nodded glaring at me. "Yes."

"Let's get you to your room. You need rest. We'll set up an appointment with the psychiatrist while we're at it, yes?" the guard said. "Anne, you'll get the lady to her room, I'll send word to the prince. He'll be happy to know you're safe, Lady America."

I realized that this guard must have been a high rank officer of some kind. I nodded and quietly said thank you, wanting badly to get to my room.

"America!" Anne exclaimed. "What happened to your head?" I felt her fingers delicately touch the back of my head, to which a yelp escaped me. "We need to get you to the infirmary. Immediately!"

"No, I need to go to me room-"

"Absolutely not." she said sternly. "General Thomas, tell them she's in the hospital wing."

"Yes, ma'am." he smiled, turning back around and walking Aspen to a staff stairwell.

"He totally likes you." I commented.

"You, hush!" she scolded. We walked quickly but carefully to the infirmary.

"Dear god." the doctor said when she looked at me. Did I really look that bad? "Take off the robe and nightgown and put on one of the provided, the nurse will dispose of yours. I'll be right back."

I slipped off the robe, gasping as I realized why I had gotten such harsh reactions. The whole back of my robe was covered in blood. My blood. I quickly changed and sat in the bed.

The doctor rushed in with a tray of things. I noticed a particularly long needle among them. "What happened? Do you remember?"

"Well-" I stopped, there was no way around this that didn't complicate Aspen. "I need Maxon. Before anything, I have to tell him something."

"Your health is imperative-"

"And so is this!" I exclaimed. "I lasted long enough with the wound, I can last ten more minutes-"

"America." the doors opened quickly, revealing Maxon. He practically ran to my side, placing a hand on my cheek and the other on top of my own. "America, I've been so scared, where were you?" I could hear his voice choke up a bit at the end, he was even more distraught than I was.

"We got stuck in a remote safe room on my floor-"

"We?" he asked, confused.

"That's what I need to tell you about." I said slowly. "You have to promise that this stays between you, me, and the doctor. No one else can know, please-"

"America, of course, what happened?" he asked, sounding so scared.

I looked up at the doctor, awaiting her response. She nodded, "I won't say a thing."

Tears filled my eyes as I reimagined the events of the past two days. "I was running to the safe room, but there were rebels, I was going to turn around, but I felt something sharp hit the back of my head." I shook my head and looked away from Maxon. "I passed out. When I woke up, I was in a safe room meant for staff with Aspen."

"Aspen?" Maxon's voice dropped.

"He said he hit me, and he wanted to talk to me alone, Maxon I swear I didn't-"

"I know darling." he said, squeezing my hands in his. "I know you wouldn't. It's alright."

"No, it's not. He grabbed me, and yelled at me-" I shuddered, cries easily escaping me.

"He touched you?" Maxon said angrily all of a sudden. "Where is he?"

"Your highness, I know that whatever is going on is important, but I need to treat her." the doctor interjected, sounding irritated.

"Of course." Maxon said, swallowing hard.

"Lady America, do you know what you were hit with?" she asked, looking and touching at the back of my head.

"No. But it felt sharp."

"You've lost lots of blood. I'm surprised you're still awake right now."

"Me too."

"Lady America, do you know how long you were passed out?" the doctor asked.

"I woke up around 20 minutes before the doors to the safe room opened." I said.

"What?" the both of them said in unison.

"America, you were out for two days?" Maxon said.

"We need to do tests and runs on her, immediately your highness, there could be some serious damage." the doctor said nervously.

"Of course, I won't delay you-"

"Maxon wait." I said. "Promise me we'll deal with Aspen together."

"America, he's hurt you quite enough-" he said angrily.

"Please. When I'm out of tests, promise me we'll do it together." I pleaded.

He looked at me sadly and nodded. "He will sit in a cell until then."

"Okay." thinking that was more than fair for now.

"But you have to promise me you'll be okay. Okay?" he said, his eyes watery and lips tight.

I nodded, crying. "I promise."

He gave me a gently kiss and then softly kissed the top of my forehead. "I'll see you soon."

* * *

 **Yay so the real chapter has been uploaded and it makes sense! I hope you liked this very original scene! From here on out, most of everything will be original because I've changed the course of events so much. I hope you like it! Let me know what you think! Until next time... xoxo -J**


	7. Chapter 7

**Hey everyone, here's the newest chapter! Enjoy~**

* * *

It had been 4 days since I woke up after the rebel attack. Every muscle in my body was tense as I went on day after day. Maxon and I talked and decided that he should be removed from his duties in the palace for assaulting me the way he did. Since there was no proof other than the stitches on the back of my head, we didn't want the world to know. He went back to Carolina to serve the crown there. Far away from me.

I was technically still recovering from the concussion, but all I wanted to do was go outside. Too bad the sunlight hurt my eyes too much. So I remained a recluse inside, avoiding the other girls who attacked me with questions. All I said was that a rebel hit my head, but I managed to escape to a remote safe room. No one but me, Maxon, Anne, and General Thomas knew Aspen was there with me and that he really hit me. And it was going to stay that way.

"Lady Singer." an unfamiliar but deep voice said behind me.

I turned around, only to see the King standing there with a displeased look on his face. "Your highness." I curtsied softly, feeling a little dizzy.

"I know you're..." he looked me up and down and then met my eyes before continuing, "...injured...but do you insist on wearing _pants_ on a Thursday?"

I looked down at my plain outfit. I had on a pair of soft jeans and a loose white blouse. "I'm sorry, but I wasn't feeling up to playing dress up today." I said lamely.

He raised his eyebrows, quite obviously not liking my response. "I assume you'll change for dinner? Into the appropriate attire of course."

"Yes, your highness." I said, starting to feel really dizzy now. I had been on my feet too long now. "If you'll excuse me."

"Now just wait." he said strongly. "I came to ask your intentions."

"My intentions?" I asked, a little more perky now that such strange questions were being asked.

"Yes. What are you intentions for being here?" he asked, a slight tone of disgust in his voice.

"I'm here for Maxon." I said quickly.

"I doubt that." he said with a cold smile. "Being a five, I question any other motive than the money and crown."

"That's not true, sir-"

"Don't interrupt." he said sternly. "I just want you to know this; you're only here as a 'fan favorite'. A five will never rule along side my son. Not if I can help it."

"You can't." I said firmly.

"Excuse me?" he said, his face turning meaner by the second.

"You can't help it. Maxon controls the selection, your highness. And as much as he values your opinion, I believe he'll choose me." I said, trying not to shake as I said so.

He smiled smugly and shook his head, "I'm sure my son has filled the same nonsense into all of your pretty little heads. Besides. You'd be surprised by just how much he takes my opinion into account." he said. "Make sure you come dressed to dinner."

With that, he turned away, walking up the stairs to the royal chambers floor.

* * *

I looked at the King as I walked into the dining hall in my jeans and blouse. He looked downright furious, but I didn't care. I'd show him that Maxon loved me for me. I didn't care what he thought. I took a peak at Maxon, only to see a giddy smile on his lips and a finger immediately tug his ear.

I smiled and sat down, discreetly tugging back a moment later. "You know, you don't have to keep trying to get his attention America." Kriss said to me. "You've pulled plenty of stunts now with the whole passing out and now the head injury? Did you really have to come to dinner in _jeans_?"

Before I could even open my mouth to defend myself, Celeste crossed her arms and said, "Oh shut up Celeste."

"Excuse me?" her small voice said a little louder.

"You're not excused." Celeste smiled sickly. "Quit lashing out at America just because Maxon likes you less."

I sat with my mouth wide and eyebrows raised, _why was she defending me like this?_ Kriss blushed furiously and looked down.

Elise perked up a little and said, "You have no idea what their relationship is like, Celeste-"

"You're right." Celeste turned to Elise. "Since it's non-existent, it really is hard to know what it would be like-"

"Shut up!" Kriss shrieked. Everyone was silent now, the royal family looking strangely at the four of us.

After a few minutes of strange silence, Maxon cleared his throat and said "Maybe it'd be best if you each took dinner in your rooms."

Elise quickly stood up, always first to obey an order, and turned to Kriss who shot me a dirty look. The two of them walked out of the room, Kriss in small tears. I looked at Maxon, who had a perplexed look about him and turned back around to walk with Celeste.

"Why'd you do that?" I asked slowly, not sure I wanted to know the answer.

"Look. I don't like you much. But I like you better than her." she said as she walked. Her tan legs poked in and out of the slit in her long navy colored dress as she walked. "I know that it's not going to matter what I do, Maxon won't choose me over you. And I think I've come to an understanding with myself that I won't be queen. I'm just trying to keep her as far away from the crown as possible."

"Thank you...I think...look I don't like Kriss much either, but I didn't realize you hated her..." I said carefully.

"I have my reasons." Celeste said vaguely.

"Are you gonna tell me? Or leave me to wonder by myself?" I said as we walked up the stairs to the floor where our bedrooms were.

She sighed, looking at her nails a little as we walked. "I guess I could tell you. Have dinner with me in my room. I'll tell you all about it." She walked over to her door and opened it up.

Her room was nothing like mine. Mine still looked the way it did when I first got here months ago. The walls in Celeste's room had been painted a gorgeous plum color with white crown moulding on the ceiling. On the bed was a divine, bright white comforter that had little baby rhinestones here and there so that it literally sparkled. She had a large vanity overflowing with lipsticks and eye shadows. On the floor was a huge white shag rug. Around the room hung posters of movie stars and famous models I had only ever heard of. Celeste walked around the room and tossed her small clutch onto the grey sofa in the corner. Her maids came to her side when she lifted her arms up and took off her dress.

"Celeste!" I held up my hands to cover my eyes.

"My god, it's not like you don't have anything I have." I could tell she was rolling her eyes.

"A little warning would have been nice."

"You can open," she sighed. I slowly removed my hand to see her in a silky nightgown. She flopped on her bed and said, "Go tell the kitchens America is having dinner in here with me."

The three maids rushed away quickly, eager to leave. "So, you were telling me about Kriss."

"Ugh. Right." she said, propping her head up with her arm as she laid on her side. "Well, last week the bitch sent a note to Maxon on my behalf to cancel our date cause I wasn't feeling well. She stole my date. Ugh. Then, she had the audacity to lie to me, and when I confronted her she acted like nothing happened."

"She did?" I asked, a little stunned at the cunning of Kriss.

"Yep. But the worst thing is that she told Maxon I had an STD. That's why I wasn't feeling up to the date."

"What?" I yelped.

"Shhh!" Celeste hissed.

"Do you?" I asked.

"No, of course not!" She said, angrily. "She just said it to make him think worse of me."

"Celeste, there's only one way to get those...if he thought you-"

"He doesn't." she snapped. "When she told him, he immediately had me tested. Everything came back negative."

"Good. But why did he believe her?" I asked, suddenly feeling wrong about this situation.

"I guess he couldn't be too sure, but he's obviously not mad at her for the lie. They're going on a date later tonight. She couldn't stop bragging about it yesterday when you were in the hospital. What did happen to you-" she asked, turning the conversation to me.

"They're going on a date?" I avoided her question.

She nodded. The door opened, two trays being brought in. Dinner was grilled duck with rosemary potatoes and sautéed carrots. We ate as I told her about why I was in the hospital. I told her all about Aspen and everything around it. It was relieving to talk to someone about my problems. Someone I felt I could trust.

After dinner we laughed and told funny stories about our life at home, about our families.

"One of my ex boyfriends, he got addicted to pot brownies America." she laughed.

"What's pot?" I asked, giggling a little.

"It's a drug, but it's not too bad for you. Just makes you loopy and happy." she laughed again.

"Have you tried it?" I asked.

She smiled, sealing her lips with her fingers and pretending to throw a key over her shoulder. "That's besides the point, America everyone's had a bad ex. You're not alone."

"At least none of yours attacked you." I said, chuckling softly.

"At least there's that. Mine just got fat from all the brownies." she said, bursting out with laughter.

"Celeste!" I swatted her arm, "That's so mean!"

"Ooh, I want brownies." she said. "I'm gonna order some."

"Ugh, I'm tired. My head hurts from laughing too much." I sighed. "I think I'm going back to my room now. We should do this more."

"Agreed. Are you sure you won't stay for brownies though?" she asked.

"Yeah. I need rest." I said, lightly feeling the stitches in the back of my head.

"Okay. See you tomorrow." she smiled.

"See ya." I stood up and walked out to my room. I looked at the phone in the corner and picked it up; after talking with Celeste for so long, I realized I missed my sister so much. She was the person I usually talked about those things with.

I clicked the digits and waited as the line rang. Seconds later, it picked up and I heard a bright, "AMES!"

"May!" I smiled. "I miss you!"

"I miss you more! What's going on? Who are you with? WAIT! How are you?"

I laughed softly and said, "Easy, tiger. I'm alone. I just had dinner with Celeste. I'm fine."

"Celeste?" I heard her say.

"Yeah, she's the closest thing to a friend I've got here."

"What about Kriss? She seems so nice!" May said, her voice even more bubbly than I remembered.

"She's alright. I'll tell you more later. I just wanted to say hi. I know you got a call when I was trapped in the room, but I just wanted to tell you myself that I'm fine. They stitched me up and I'm good again."

"Good." she said, less excited. "Stay safe, Ames. You nearly gave mom and dad a heart attack."

"I know." I said, looking down and fiddling with the chord in my fingers. "Are they around?"

"They went out to dinner tonight for the first time in forever." she said giddily. "You should have seen mom's dress."

"Are you home alone?" I asked.

"Kenna came to babysit me and Gerad. I keep telling mom I'm old enough to stay home, but she doesn't believe me." she huffed.

"I know. A few more years and you will be. Give Kenna and Gerad a hug for me."

"I will. How's everything with Maxon?" she said, I could feel her smile through the phone.

"Okay I guess." I said, confused about my emotions right now. We had told each other we loved each other. Something I didn't say often or easily. And it all seemed great, but after hearing this about Kriss and what happened to Celeste I didn't like that he was picking sides with Kriss. As well as that, the King said some pretty harsh things to me. Even though I knew they weren't coming from Maxon, I couldn't help but think maybe he thought the same thing.

"Just okay?" May asked. The door opened, revealing Maxon standing there with a small smile.

"I'll call you again later. I have to go, May." I said. "I love you."

"Love you too, Ames. Write me!"

"I will. Bye."

"Bye." the receiver clicked.

"What are you doing here?" I asked, feeling a little guarded.

"You tugged, is it not a good time?" he asked, walking towards me slowly.

"No, I just thought you had a date with Kriss." I sniffed, not looking at him long.

"I'm about to go there, yes. I just wanted to see you first." he said, trying to place his hands on my waist. I stepped back a little.

"Hey, what's wrong? Are you feeling alright?" he asked.

"Celeste told me about what Kriss accused her of." I said. "You believed her?"

He looked shocked at my statement, obviously not expecting this to be a point of discussion. "What?"

"About the.. you know. I just can't believe you believed Kriss." I said.

"Not that this is any of your business, but-" he said defensively, but I wasn't having it.

"It is my business Maxon." I said, feeling hurt. "You told me you love me. How can I know you meant it if you try to keep every other part of your life secret from me?"

"America-"

"And then she had the audacity to tell me to stop faking injuries to draw attention to myself!" I exclaimed. "She said I was trying to hog your attention."

He stood silently before saying, "She doesn't know the whole story, America. She only knows her point of view."

I couldn't believe the words coming out of his mouth. "So defend me." I said angrily. "You know my whole story."

"It's complicated." he said.

"No. It's really not. What's so hard about it? Why do you keep defending her?"

"Because you're attacking her, America, and you don't know _her_ whole story." he said defensively.

"So enlighten me." I said.

"I'm not talking about this with you." he sighed.

"I opened up to you about everything." I said, a hot tear slipping down my cheek. "I told you everything...the good and the bad. And now I feel like I don't know who you are...if you really loved me you wouldn't keep secrets about everyone and who you're going out with. I know this is a competition but I thought we were close to being finished with it all."

"We can't end it yet, so for the sake of publicity, I have to keep going on dates."

"I know. But you don't have to lie to me." I said softly.

He stood silently, his hands in his pockets and his stare distant. "I don't know what to tell you, America." he said plainly.

"Do you love her?" I asked, my voice on the brink of breaking.

He didn't answer me, just looking at me sadly.

I felt a small pain in my chest as he looked into the distance. I swallowed hard and said, "Maybe your dad was right."

His eyes shot up to mine and his eyebrows furrowed, "What?"

"Maybe your dad was right." I repeated. "He told me that you tell all of us the same things to keep us here until he's done choosing who is right for you."

"America, I don't know what else he said, but he's lying." he said quickly. "You have to trust me-"

"Trust you?" I asked sharply. "After you protect Kriss, after you lie to me about your feelings for her? After I spilled my heart out for you and risked everything only for you to lie to me about your feelings for me? No. I don't have to trust you."

"I never lied about my feelings for you." he said coldly. "I love you, and you know that."

"No, I don't know that. I thought I did, but I don't." I said, tears falling. "I'd like you to leave."

"No." he said. "We need to figure this out."

"Please, just go." I said, shaking my head.

"We still need to talk about Aspen." he said calmly.

"It can wait." I sniffled. "I'm tired, I need to take my pain meds for my head and rest. I can't do this anymore."

He nodded, "I'm sorry, I forgot about your head."

I crossed my arms and waited for him to leave.

"I'll be here in the morning to talk." he said. "Good night." He tried to kiss my cheek, but I turned my head away, not at all in the mood for any endearment.

He ducked his head and left, leaving me to my thoughts.

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 **Well the story took a curve for the worse! Stay tuned for what happens next! Hope you like the chapter! Let me know what you think :) -J**


	8. Chapter 8

**I'm so happy that y'all are liking my story! Naturally, there are new speed bumps in the story since everything's changed...hope you like how they pan out this chapter! Happy reading~**

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I sat upright in my chair as I finished my breakfast. The dining hall's air was stale with lack of conversation. Here and there Elise and Kriss would say something quietly to each other or Celeste would try and ask me a question, but I wasn't in a chatty mood. I noticed Maxon trying to catch my attention, but avoided his eyes. I didn't want to talk right now.

"America?" Celeste whispered.

"What?" I asked, setting my fork down.

"Why do you keep avoiding him? He's obviously trying to talk to you." she said, her normally confident voice low and nervous sounding.

"I'm not avoiding him." I said simply. I set my napkin down on the table and stood up. "I'm going to the women's room. I need to think."

I walked across the hall, only to find Queen Amberly sitting and doing a cross-stitch. "Excuse me, your highness, I thought I would be alone."

"Nonsense." she said softly, her smooth voice sounding like milk and honey. "You're more than welcome to join me."

I smiled a little, happy that she allowed me to take refuge in here with her. I walked over to the couches where she sat and took my place next to her. I looked at her cross-stitch to see a beautiful garden scene. It looked a lot like the one where Maxon and I met.

"That's so beautiful." I said, looking at all the vibrant flowers she had stitched.

"Thank you." she smiled, looking proud of her work. "I'm making it for my sister." She went back to her needle, weaving it in and out to create another little flower.

I watched silently, finding a sort of relief in just being with a mother-figure. Even though I constantly bickered with my own, I loved my mom, and I missed her so much. I missed everyone right now.

"Can I ask you a question?" I said quietly.

"Of course." she smiled.

"How did you know" I asked, looking down. "How did you know the King really loved you?"

"Ahh." she said, setting down her needle. "You're worried about Maxon's feelings for the others."

I nodded, fiddling with my thumbs in my lap.

"America," she sighed. "you won't find what you're looking for with me."

"But you went through the same thing," I said, looking up at her. "and I just...I don't know what to do."

"My dear, just go talk to him." she smiled. "He cares about you very much."

"He told you that?" I asked.

"He didn't have to." she said, placing one of her frail hands on my own. "Now go."

I nodded, "Thank you."

She gave me a smile in return and picked up her needle again, sewing in and out. I turned around and left the women's room. For as much as I disliked the King, the Queen already felt like family to me. I walked to the gardens, hoping to have a chance to clear my mind before facing Maxon, but it seemed like he had the same ideas in mind as I did. He was sitting on our little bench where we first met, his blazer off and light blue shirt sleeves rolled up. I could tell I caught him in a moment of deep thinking. He looked so stressed and worried sitting there on our bench. A sight I didn't want to see.

"Hey." I said softly.

He looked back quickly and stood up, walking quickly as he said, "America, I'm sorry, please you have to understand-"

"Slow down," I breathed.

He nodded, taking my hands into his. "You were right. I owe you an explanation. After everything you shared with me, I should have done the same."

"Why didn't you?" I asked, avoiding his eyes.

"I was scared. I was scared you wouldn't want to be with me. It's not the most flattering thing for me to talk about dates with other women. Whether they were bad or good." he said. "I love you too much to have you hate me."

"I don't hate you." I said, my heart feeling heavy.

"You don't?" he asked, sounding genuinely surprised.

"No, of course not." I said as I looked into his chocolate brown eyes. "I just want the truth. About it all."

He nodded as we took a seat on the bench. "Well I think I should start with Elise."

"Elise?" I asked, surprised this was what he was starting off with.

"I want you to know how I feel about everyone. So you know where you stand." he said seriously.

"Okay." I said, not knowing if this was what I wanted or not.

"Elise is here for strictly political reasons. My father and I agree she's a good back up to have around." he sighed. "I've only kissed her two or three times for formality on a date."

"I think I could have guessed that much." I said. "She's never the first to brag about her relationship."

He nodded. "There's not much else to say where she's concerned. Then there's Celeste. She and I don't really have much of a connection. I think she knows that too. She was going to be cut before Marlee before that all went down. We've kissed and shared intimate moments, but nothing emotional."

"Oh." I said, a little relieved he didn't feel anything for her. "What about Kriss?" I could hear the hesitant nerves in my voice as I asked this question.

"Kriss is hard." he said with a frown. "She's kind, sweet, caring, and safe. She makes me feel all those things too when I'm with her."

It felt like he was twisting a knife in my stomach as he said this. I don't know what I was expecting to hear, but this is wasn't it. If it wasn't for the complex look on his face, I would have thought he sounded in love with her.

"Kriss and I may not have a lot of physical chemistry, but she's always there for me at the end of the day, ready to hear about it and make me feel better. She's steady."

"And I'm not? I don't make you feel that way?" I asked, trying not to let any tears escape.

"America, you have to understand..." he said, "my love for you is stronger than anything I've ever felt before. If we could end this here and now, I would. But I can't. And I won't lie to you anymore, Kriss is a safe option for me to have. It will end up being between you two when it's all coming to a close."

"I do understand." I said quietly. I had felt a similar way with Aspen and Maxon. Maxon was a love that I never knew I could have, something that made it worth waking up every day. But Aspen was safe. I could have asked to go home and been happy with him before all of this wildness happened.

"You do?" he asked.

"I understand but it doesn't mean I like it." Every word on my tongue felt bitter as I spoke them.

"I know." he said. "I'm sorry that it's like this. Every day I wish I could have met you in a better situation. That we didn't have any of this craziness surrounding us. I wish it was just us."

"So do I." I whispered, feeling his hand squeeze mine.

"I talked to her about what she said about Celeste, and you." he said. "I told her she should be more careful in her accusations against you all. She said the Celeste thing was an honest mistake. But what she said to you, that wasn't okay. I told her as much as necessary to convince her you haven't been faking any of it. She's been nervous since it's just four of you now. But still, she can't act like that. She knows that now."

I nodded, not believing her story. But I believed Maxon when he said he stood up for me. "That's all I wanted. When you didn't back me up, it felt like you didn't care."

"Quite the opposite." he said. "I just needed to handle things properly between everyone."

"Well, I forgive you." I said, looking into his eyes.

He smiled, his eyes softening as he did so. He wrapped his arms around me, enveloping me in a hug. I nuzzled my head into his chest and breathed in deeply. His scent immediately soothed me, making my worries fade.

"Hey," he said. "You never did tell me what you meant by my dad being right."

"Oh." I pulled away. "That."

"That." he repeated.

"He pulled me aside yesterday and told me you were only keeping me around as a people's favorite. That you didn't feel the way you do about me. He wants me gone, he was rather harsh about that." I said.

"You believed him?" He asked, sounding hurt.

"No." I said flatly. "No, it just felt like he might be right when you were defending Kriss and not me. I was upset. I'm sorry."

"It's okay. I'll talk to him. Promise."

"Okay."

"There's one more thing we need to talk about."

"I know. Aspen." I stood up, hearing his feet on the gravel behind me.

"What do you want to do about him? He's in one of the cells right now waiting on your decision."

"I think we should send him back to Carolina. To be with his family."

"Will he still be a two?" Maxon asked as we slowly walked towards a little plain of grass.

"I didn't think that was up to me..." I said honestly.

"Well, I was thinking he could remain a two. He could serve as a fireman in Carolina. So he can provide for his family. I just don't want him to stay a guard...I don't trust him that way after what he did to you. I never will." He said calmly.

I stopped and looked up at him. "You would do that?" I knew he hurt me, and he was delusional for doing so, but I knew him. He wasn't always that person. I hurt him badly after he hurt me, but I didn't hate him. Even though I was angry for what he did.

Maxon nodded, "I thought you would know by now that I would do anything for you, America."

I smiled and gently placed my hands on his chest, tilting my head back to kiss him. It felt as if in this past ten seconds, all the puzzle pieces had been set in place and the grand picture was clear now. All of this worry and struggle on both sides felt like it was for something now. Even though I still had to live with knowing Kriss loved him, he would live knowing Aspen loved me. I was willing to put everything else on the line for Maxon, and I just had to hope he'd be willing to do the same.

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 **Sooooooo? What do you think? Let me down below! I hope you enjoyed reading...the next chapter will be to die for... I'm having so much fun writing it and can't wait for you to read it! turn on notifications to see when it comes out! Thanks for reading -J**


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